it's not faith if you're using your eyes

Title unrelated. It's just what I'm listening to.

I saw my first wild skunk today! It was rooting through the old gingerbread house we threw in the front rock garden, munching on it all the while. I'd never been that close to an actual, live skunk before and it was actually quite adorable. Skunks have an obvious stigma in this society, so I always wrote them off as undesirable animals. But the way it was snuffling through the rocks and bits of cookie... Awwwwww. It had this funny, roly-poly method of walking too. I really wanted to pet it.

But that would have been a terrible idea. So I didn't.

Lyrical Interlude #2

windows of frosted ice
prisming candlelight
and somehow we start to believe

in the night and the dream
as it cuts through the noise
with the whisper of snow
as it starts to deploy

in the depths of a night
that’s about to begin
with the feeling of snow
as it melts on your skin

and it covers the land
with a dream so intense
that it returns us all
to a child’s innocence
and then what you’d thought lost
and could never retrieve
is suddenly there to be found...
on christmas eve !!

Weather Update.

I love the snow. :D

The White Owl.

Deep in a midnight forest paces a white owl. She hops from branch to branch, thinking all the while. There is a field mouse braiding blades of grass together in a clearing not far from here. She knows this mouse. So close, so accessible...


The field mouse hasn't done any wrong to her directly, of course. It's gnawed on the roots at the base of the tree in which the owl has built her nest. When strong winds blow, things are uneasy. It's always in the back of her mind. Of all their minds. This, she knows.


How easy it would be to swoop down, snatch up the problematic rodent and rip it to shreds with her majestic bill. How wonderful. But. Would it really solve her problem? Would it repair the shredded roots?


The owl takes off from the branch, silent silvery feathers turning her into a whisp of a being. Talons unfurl and muscles tighten in ecstacy of the hunt...



But clawtips barely brush fur. At the last second, she raises her feet, tucking them into the down of her underbelly as she banks sharply to the right and ascends into the branches again. Yellow eyes stare down at the field mouse, panicked but still alive.


It is not the owl's place to bring justice to the world this way. Feathers bristle anxiously on her neck. She hoots lowly. She'll fix her nest and forget about the mouse. Forget.



And so she takes off into the night.

gobble gobble.

Annual Thanksgiving Week Thankful!post.

It's sort of a tradition for me; I've done a post like this every year since I started blogging. It's not whether or not anyone reads it, it's mostly a reflection for myself. But if you enjoy it, then even better.

BEING THANKFUL...

- For art. In general. For being something to look at, something to think about and something to do.

- For my coworkers and superiors who are absolute sweethearts to me and make working not such a horrible, painful chore all the time, even though I complain about it.

- For my family, because they are nothing short of amazing and I don't know where I'd be without them and their support. Even Biscuit, who chews on my shoes and wires.

- For inside jokes, because they make me lolololololololol on a daily basis.

- For RIC, especially the art center, a magical place with collectable particles that feels like a second home.

- For my old friends, who despite being away at other colleges have maintained contact and are always good for conversation.

- For my new friends, because they are epic people I wouldn't want to have to live without.

- For Nicole, my partner-in-crime and someone who gets me on every level imaginable. Team DNPWWO can read each other's minds and always has a leash in hand. We predict the future together via astrology, and I can't wait to watch that over-expensive TV system at her house next to my swamp.

- For Kyle, without whom Project Tricycle wouldn't be able to funciton or exist. I feel as if I can tell him everything and anything... It was a fateful day, that September afternoon, where three lives were changed over Coloraid and bristol board! Jeez louise!

- For Dave, who has taught me what it means to be truly loved. I never thought I'd meet (or deserve) someone who can still make me feel so warm and fluttery inside even after all this time. Compatibility doesn't get much more perfect than this. ... Even though I'm not Spiderman.

- For scarves, penguins, dragons, videogames, jinglebells, animals, beads, druids, music, my car and other things that simply make me happy.

- For the way everything has played out and seemingly locked into place. I've always stood by my 'everything happens for a reason' view, and it has never been truer than this past year.

<3

Always thinking about something weird.

There's this strange habit I have. When there's a lull in my thoughts and I happen to know what time it is, I will calculate where I will be or where I have been at that exact time plus or minus 12 hours. Usually twelve. Sometimes 24. If I'm looking forward to something particularly exciting, it can stretch to 36 or 48 hours. Like, "Only 30 hours until I see..." Then the calculation expands to "6 of those hours will be for sleeping and 7 of them will be for school, so..." Or, "At this time tomorrow..."

Like right now. It's Tuesday the 18th, half past noon. Twelve hours ago I was asleep: I went to bed early because World of Warcraft was denying me my server and I didn't feel like being awake anymore. Twelve hours from now, I bet I'll still be up. There's a lot I want to do after work. Twenty four hours ago, I was glazing a few of my ceramic pieces and nearly dropped one in the bucket. A week ago, I had barely been awake for an hour and was nestled between two sources of warmth in my partner-in-crime's art room.

How time changes.

Madness? Maybe.

Get your coats, we're leaving.

I've never had so many events to look forward to before. Planning has been bumped to December, which is already looking exciting.

Wow.

Lyrical Interlude #1

I see the stars, they're in your eyes
A playful kiss, can you tell I'm excited?
A fast escape in the nick of time
If you lost your wish, can I help you to find it?
I'm on my knee, just one to start
A fresh new start, don't be undecided

If love's the word
That you say
Then say it
I will listen .

triadic.

Weird clothes. Rockband. Do I know you? Cowboy hats. Dancing everywhere. Questionable literature. Laughter. Truths. Honesty. Side B. Prickle of tears. Personal. You asked me if I was worried. You could see it in my eyes. Revelation. I am. A little. Thought provoking. It's raining. Thank you.

The mountain, the hibiscus, the raven. The triad.

Incredibly blessed.

In so many ways.

A bird's perspective.

The mountains tell me not to entangle myself in the web; the starry sky stays mostly silent. The world wouldn't be complete without both earth and air, but everyone can see the coarse sandstorm twisting through the forest.

However.

My wings are tired - I don't want to hover on this horizon anymore.

Thrift Shopping

Basically, there's nothing else like it.

There's so much to do! And there's always different stuff every time you go! But you need a companion. I don't think I'd want to explore Savers by myself. There'd be no one to giggle with.

I bought the MOST gorgeous dress tonight. For ten dollars. Like, not even a summer dress. A for real, night on the town, sparkly awesome floor-length dress. I dunno when I'll ever wear it, but it was only ten dollars.

Birthday shenanigans, maybe?

Winter wonderland?

Hmm.

Imagine if this was snow.

Despite the basement flooding (again) and dangerous driving conditions, I must say I've rather enjoyed the rain this weekend. It's been quite a while since we've had such a wet spell. It's certainly rained and drizzled, but there was some serious downpouring today.

I love the smell of rain. I can actually smell it through the vents in my air conditioner right now. I stepped out of the garage while it was coming down pretty hard earlier and just stood there a while, getting soaked. The raindrops were big enough to almost hurt at that speed - almost. And they tasted oddly sweet.

Changing Kaiju's Motto

I really wanted to write a long entry about how incredibly amazing, warm and loved I feel after all of yesterday... But I've been sitting here deliberating over which words to use, and none of them come even close to what I want to express. I'm beginning to think it's actually impossible at this point in time, and I can't remember the last instance of this I've run into. I'm normally pretty eloquent.

Suffice it to say that my family is epic. And more importantly, your heartbeat is my favorite sound in the world, and being too far away to hear it is difficult.

Only good for time and a half?

I realized I don't really like Sunday nights at all. Unless I have plans and things aren't ordinary, they're really sort of a downer.

I start to dread Monday even though my classes are great just because it's been so long since I've been in them. I was having such a good day today I nearly forgot that it was Monday. They used to suck so bad in past school years.

Sundays are also when I realize how far away my Fridays are. Friday nights have been increasingly awesome since school started, and I'm usually still basking in said awesome during all of Saturday.

---

On a completely unrelated note, I wish that Best Buy's Rockband set didn't have to be broken.

reflected in a water-mirror.

nagarete-yuku mizu ni utsuru

kanashimi ga aru kara

kono chikara de kono inochi de

omae wo mamoritai

[ reflected in the flowing water

there is sorrow, so

with this power, with this life

I want to protect you ]

I really enjoy rediscovering songs that I haven't heard in ages - months, in this case. I impressed myself by singing along and missing only one line. It's sort of funny how some things just never leave your mind despite how much other stuff you try to cram into it.

And here we go!

High hopes for this semester.


I has them!

In Memoriam

RIP Expressing Ourselves Through Clothing at Michaels

Late Summer 2006-August 31, 2008

You will be missed.

Much complaining was done by all of us today. None of us wanted you to go, but alas, Corporate decided it was your time. We don't believe your absence will solve anything, as the general public is mostly clueless anyway.

But our voices were not heard on this matter. And for this, we are sorry.

With thoughts of you in our minds, a bunch of us shall dress in khaki and black and hang out in the store for hours when we are NOT working. And therefore will not have to be of assistance. Plenty of evil plans, I has them.

---

On the same note, I was outside right before close tonight. I was wearing a RED Michaels apron, pushing multiple RED carriages with 'MICHAELS' written on them, in the parking lot where the building with matching colors and logos loomed behind me.

Someone got out of their car and asked me if I worked there.

...

What the hell, people.

and when the darkness starts to fall I'll be around...

If, years ago, someone psychic had told me that some of the greatest moments of my existance were going to be

Enduring a freezing-cold sandstorm on the beach
Walking around a theme park (when I don't really like rides!)
Standing by a rock in the wilderness
Sitting in a parking lot for hours

I would have told them they were lying.

But they would have been the farthest from lying anyone could be.

Through the eyes of a Dragon

They used to be blue - they're legally blue!

But I'm fairly sure my eyes aren't blue anymore. I spent some time deliberating over what color I'd call them the other day. Are they gray? Sometimes they look green, too. What I like best is this odd little ring of gold that appears around the irises. They're colors I'd like to paint, but I'm sure I wouldn't be able to capture - much like clouds!

They're not demonically startling, where you'd notice at first glance (though that would be fun...) - but they're different! I occasionally have trouble with eye contact for long periods of time, so I wonder who else has seen.

Thinking Back on Some Things

I really enjoy the sound of your voice, too.

Take my hand - we'll make it, I swear

There's nothing like a big trip to the great outdoors to make me realize just how many small things can really make me happy...

The way the cool breeze whisks my hair around my face.
The sound of seven voices laughing together.
Getting temporarily lost in the world where dragons are bronze and wolverines have spikes.
Doodling.
A warm hand on my back while I fall asleep.
Realizing that the rain was not a curse, but a blessing.
Watching birds eat sweetbread, then share with their young.
Letting our imaginations run wild!
That one, glowing green meteor that only we saw.
Whispered promises by the waterside that I'd never trade for anything.
Recapping events under a tree, waiting for a tow truck.

And so much more, but most of all:

Making the best of everything that happens because of who I'm lucky enough to be in the company of.

Cooking Skill +5

A few months ago, I bought a cute manga-style Japanese cookbook at Borders. It lay dormant on my shelf for a while, collecting dust, but earlier this week I decided I'd have to make use of it for something new. So, I made yakitori for the family tonight - and it was a huge success. I impressed myself.

It's basically chicken-meatballs on a skewer, though I found the skewers to be more or a hindrance than anything. Ground chicken, cornstarch, an egg, sesame seeds and spring onion. They were cooked in a pan (and had nice, crispy edges) and I even went a step further and reduced teriyaki sauce into a glaze for the top of them.

My brother and I sifted through the book after dinner, and we decided that we're gonna make rice bun sandwiches, tamago tomodachi (egg buddies!) and octopus sausages together next time. :]

And the Gryffins...!

I didn't think it was ever going to happen. But it will.

I'm going to step into the world of for-reals online gaming. I got my proverbial feet wet today (well, the real ones too, but that's just because it was pouring) and... and...

World of Warcraft.

I am so ready for this.

Happy August

Wow, August already? Only a month left?

Although, I can't really say I'm dreading going back to school. At least not in the way I used to when I was a kid (as if not one now, ha). I have a nice semester ahead of me, and I really do love the winter. Ceramics sounds uber promising, and I can't wait to spend countless hours in the art building again. My second home. But, I think what I'm looking forward to most are my already-much-anticipated visits.

Along that line; finally a coinciding day off next week. I never knew a string of days could go by so slowly when you're looking forward to something - but don't know when that something's occurring.

This summer has been, by far, the most exciting and fulfilling one of my life. And that is no hyperbole.

sniff sniff.

Even though I went swimming, my hair still smells like work. Times like these make me glad it's juat a craft store. I smell of dried flowers and cinnamon. And yarn, maybe?

The sense of smell is very much connected to my ability to remember things. It's always been that way. Hmm.

Of Days To Come

I don't like this feeling. I don't like this awkwardness. I just want it to be a good time.
Like before.

It's going to be hard to keep my mouth shut for 24 hours.

I want this week to go by quickly.

Edit:
I still dislike said awkward, but now I feel much better~

Treasure Hunting

I have an immense collection of bits and baubles that I find on the floor at work. Pieces of broken glass, stones, stray beads, bits of metal, fabric scraps, jinglebells... The list goes on.

Today, however, I found a coin. I thought it was just a wheat penny at first and ignored it, but when I picked it up, I was pleasantly surprised. The color is a little more golden than a penny, but it's roughly the same size and easily mistakable. One side has a large '50' with a flower lying in the 0, and the word groschen; the other has a shield and republik osterreich.

My epic skills of deduction led me to believe it was German, but when I looked it up after my shift I found out it was actually from Austria. 50 groschen equals half a schilling, and it was only minted in '61, so it can't be worth much at all.

But it brightened my night. The collection grows ever larger.

Obligatory Intro

My internet spazzery needed a new home - and this place is as good as any.